For someone thinking about getting into the lifestyle, you've probably heard a few things about the Swinging community, which the lifestyle can portray in a bad light.
This article is to debunk some of the misconceptions you've heard about swingers. I truly believe I live one of the best lifestyles, and even though some adverse things can happen, most of it is extraordinary.
Swingers have pampas grass in their gardens.
It was used as a sign for swingers back in the day, but it is such a wildly used plant for gardening it has now also become a fashion in interior design.
Swingers have moved away from pampas grass and now wear Swinging jewellery to show that they are swingers. The other way is showing the pineapple. Swingers across the USA & UK are currently claiming the pineapple as a sign of being in the lifestyle.
Swinging is mainly for older people.
There is now, more than ever, younger swingers in the lifestyle. It is becoming widely more accepted to have threesomes, foursomes, orgies, and polyamorous relationships.
I feel that the younger generation are more open and excepting to experiencing new things. I have seen with my eyes Swingers aged from 20 to 80, from all different backgrounds.
No matter how old you are, there is something very similar to your age range.
People swing because they're unhappy with their partners.
It is purely for extra fun, excitement and kicks. You find most swinging couples are more stable and have more trust within their relationship, and are concrete.
You also find most of the time that one of the party members is bicurious or bisexual and wants to explore that side.
I always imagine Swinging as an adrenaline-filled hobby. Some people might like to skydive others may want to go paintballing. For me, sharing another couple with my husband is my excitement.
Swinging is a male-dominated environment.
Yes and no.
There are a lot of men in the swinging lifestyle and on swinging websites.
Men are more open to trying new things and maybe don't get the same reaction as couples and women when you say you're in the swinging lifestyle.
Unfortunately, the swinging community is going through a phase of single men who don't understand the lifestyle of joining Swinging websites. They almost think it's a guarantee they can get their dicks wet. Unfortunately, this is not the case. As per my TikTok video, "Single or Swingle" takes a particular type of single to be in the lifestyle and truly understand it's not just about sex.
You can't be a parent and be involved in swinging.
We are parents to two children and find time to swing on date nights while we are away on hotel breaks and during the day while the kids are at school when we have a day off together through the week.
Most swingers I've met have children, and it doesn't stop you from getting into the lifestyle.
STDs are common in the swinging community.
Swingers are savvy when it comes to protection. I believe swingers are probably Durex's number one customer! Everyone has the same mindset when using condoms – it's better to be safe than sorry and always leave a meet with peace of mind.
The other question is, do swingers contract STD's and the answer is yes. There are swingers out there who do not use condoms and don't protect themselves. What you do in your bedroom is your own choice, and if you're happy, that's okay, but I will always use condoms.
If you are looking for condom recommendations you can check out Vista Recommends - Condoms
Swingers will sleep with anyone.
This is not the case. Like everyone else, there has to be that initial attraction and chemistry. Just because you like threesomes, foursomes, orgies, and kinks doesn't mean you will sleep with anyone.
I have had single men message me on FabSwingers, constantly asking why I won't meet them.
It's a simple answer; I am not attracted to them.
Experimenting with partner swapping is a way that couples' cheat' on each other without recrimination.
Being non-monogamous is not cheating as it's consensual from both sides of the relationship.
The key is open and honest communication between the couple, so each knows what's going on.
If your partner isn't 100% entirely into the idea, then don't do it. It will be brought back up later down the line and can have a downbeat ending.
"But Vista... I want to persuade my partner to get into the lifestyle."
Then talk talk talk talk and talk some more! Make sure to read 'How to have the conversation' if you're unsure how to bring it up to your partner.